 |
| Author | Post |
|---|
hummingbird
Member
|
Posted: Sun Jun 3rd, 2007 11:15 pm |
|
I had a feeling this might happen. Rising senior son is very blase about the whole college process. I buy him college guides and he doesn't look at them. He's not interested in talking about it, except on rare occasions. We're going on a big college visit trip in 2 weeks, so hopefully that will light a fire.
But his younger sister, age 14, is VERY interested. She wishes she could go to college NOW!  She has all the college books in her room and peruses them at every opportunity. She's constantly talking about colleges. I told her she might not want to bring up that topic with her friends too often, because they're probably not thinking about colleges just yet. She agreed, they're not.
Hopefully this is a phase. I don't want her to get burned out or freak out if she gets a B (now I can't get into Stanford!!!). Yet I can't really shield her from it either now that we're heading full-force into the application process with the older one.
She's always been a great student, but just slightly behind her brother in terms of grades and ease in getting them. I think it all stems from competition. They're 2 1/2 years apart, almost to the day.
Anybody else had this family dynamic?Last edited on Sun Jun 3rd, 2007 11:16 pm by hummingbird
|
PrimetimeMom
Member
| Joined: | Mon Mar 6th, 2006 |
| Location: | Los Angeles |
| Posts: | 157 |
| Mana: |    |
|
Posted: Mon Jun 4th, 2007 01:57 am |
|
I think most families have some version of sibling rivalry at this stage. My two children are also 2 1/2 years apart. Oldest, my D who is 19, did well with grades/testing in HS without any effort and recently dropped out of CC. Youngest, my S, works very hard and gets about the same grades. D likes to remind him about this which I don't like.
However, the work ethic S has will enable him to succeed in College where D was not able to. I think she needles him out of a feeling of insecurity.
Your D is probably latching onto the college stuff to get a rise out of her brother. Maybe it will work. Or at the least will inspire her to work harder. It all sounds normal and good
|
WestrnMom
Super Moderator
| Joined: | Fri May 26th, 2006 |
| Location: | West Coast, USA |
| Posts: | 1188 |
| Mana: | |
|
Posted: Mon Jun 4th, 2007 03:13 am |
|
Not the same dynamic but some competition about who got more of my help (the younger one, definitely) and whether they are each getting the same amount of financial help as the other (no way to tell without pulling out all the bills. We told thelm they get what they need based on what we can afford, not dollar for dollar equality). In my experience with a lot of parents who have children my kids' ages (I've been very involved with various "kid" activities over the years so I'm in touch with a huge number of parents) it seems that boys are less eager when they are juniors, but tend to get more excited after they have been admitted and know where they can choose from. Girls tend to see the bigger picture (not true of all girls or all boys, but enough that we know it seems to be gender-based). Of course, there was the core group of students, both boys and girls, who all wanted to go to NYU. I'm still not sure why, but that was the one school the most kids we know have mentioned.
Last edited on Mon Jun 4th, 2007 03:14 am by WestrnMom
|
CarolynLawrence
Administrator
| Joined: | Sun Mar 5th, 2006 |
| Location: | USA |
| Posts: | 3279 |
| Mana: | |
|
Posted: Mon Jun 4th, 2007 04:14 pm |
|
My son didn't seem to be paying much attention in 9th and 10th grades when my daughter was looking at colleges and sending out applications. But, I've noticed that he is much more aware and savvy about factors affecting admissions than she was at this point in the game, so I suspect that he was actually like a fly on the wall, absorbing information and learning from his sister's experiences. So, don't discourage your daughter too much from her dreams -- she will benefit in the long run.
As for sibling rivalry, it's very subtle between my two kids. They're best buddies in many ways, so they cheer each other on. But, when my son's SAT scores came in, one of the first things he asked was how they compared to his sister's. I also have had to be careful when my daughter asks about my son's college list. Some of the schools on his list that are matches were more reach schools for her, and she has commented on that once or twice, especially as he's considering using her college as a safety. Different kids, different admissions profiles, but easy for sibling egos to be bruised.
Last edited on Mon Jun 4th, 2007 04:20 pm by CarolynLawrence
|
Thumper
Member
| Joined: | Sun Mar 5th, 2006 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 223 |
| Mana: | |
|
Posted: Sat Jun 9th, 2007 09:36 pm |
|
| Dd was in 7th grade when DS began his college visits. She was VERY interested in one school in particular which she commented on repeatedly for about 4 years...saying she was applying there and no where else...we didn't need to bother even looking. When her junior year came, however, and she did look at other schools, that one was not even a consideration. I would say that anything that your DD is doing now re: college interests should be viewed as that only...college interests. AND don't think twice about the difference between your two kiddos. The college searches and interest levels of my two kiddos were totally and completely different....not even the same geographic area.
|
Current time is 06:37 pm | |
|
|
|
|
